Sunday, August 3, 2008 @10:57 PM
man i love church. tht's where my heart belongs to bah. sheepie is still angry with me.. but at least she still talked to me on msn which isn't too bad. patience alina.. patience. im still learning bah.. and probably utterly failing. but it's ok. it's all in the process. nobody said it's gonna be easy. well.. i wanna live a life of holiness before God and not before men. it's easy to be holy in front of people.. but what goes on in the mind, is a whole different story..
it's easy not to scold someone in the face, but still think negative thoughts towards the person. after all, everything does begin with the mind. and what goes on in the mind, is generated from the heart itself. the bible says, out of the abundance of the heart, the mouth speaks. pastor Pat schatzline once said, watch your words; they become thoughts.
watch your thoughts; they become actions.
watch your actions; they become habits.
watch your habits; they become character.
and finally, watch your character; they become your destiny.
once again, quoted from pastor daniel, character is who you are when no one is looking.
i guess actions speaks louder than words. and sometimes, we only talk the talk, but we dun walk the talk. it's easy to say it, but it's a whole different matter to do it. i may sound like im preaching but who cares. haha. this is wad's on my heart right now..
was very very rude to my dad this morning and i felt real bad about it. i guess. i must learn how to forgive him and forget all that he has done. God help me. dun wanna elaborate. but anyway, i felt so convicted for being rude to him. i wanna be a good daughter.. work hard be it in aranda or Nebo, earn enough money and pay him back for the camera and all. i dun wan him to worry about monetary issues. also not forgetting to save up for the year end mission trip to myanmar once again. so in total, i must save up $2600. difficult, but not impossible. save up alina!
on sat, i went for the Generations-wide Back to the Alter Prayer Meeting. i came late because i woke up late. (as you all know i have a very bad sleeping problem-.-) but the moment i started to pray, i saw this vision of many many insects. which resembled cockroaches or perhaps beetles. and i felt the Lord say to me that perhaps, i havn't been cleaning up my own life such that i've attracted spiritual pests in. and i knew that something must be done. i need God. oh so much. and there's nothing i can do about it.
as for sheepie, all i can do is love her for who she is, and lift her up in prayer. after all, love overcomes all things amen?
for Your love is higher than the heavens
deeper than the seas
and all i want is You in my life
no one else can satisfy my soul
make me feel this way
only You Lord,
only You.
